It’s hard to write about kindness when I’m feeling wounded.
Here’s what Godwin Samararatne has to say about this:
Human beings carry what I call wounds; wounds created by what you have done to others, and wounds created by what others have done to you. I think everyone here, including myself, can relate to this. What happens with some human beings is that they continue to carry these wounds within themselves. So if you carry these wounds within without healing them you can create suffering for yourself and suffering for others, without knowing that the suffering is in relation to the wounds you are carrying.
With these unhealed wounds we cannot live peacefully, we cannot sleep peacefully, and we cannot die peacefully. Therefore it is extremely important to learn to heal these wounds. Meditation of loving-kindness can help us to heal these wounds by learning to forgive ourselves and learning to forgive others. Forgive ourselves by realising that we are only human. Forgive others by realising that they are only human too. Also learning to let go of the wounds by realising that they happened in the past. We cannot change the past, so why should we carry the past as a burden to create more and more suffering for ourselves and others in the present? (Read the full speech here, it’s worth it.)
I hear ya universe. Message received. And you, little vainglorious woman, who hurt me, you’re forgiven. I’m not carrying you with me any more. Quoting Godwin once again:
I forgive you: may you be well, may you be happy, may you be free of suffering.